Some days I absolutely love being Mum. Others not so much. Being Mum means the brunt of the work and responsibility lies on my shoulders. I know this isn’t the case in every house but in ours it is. I have to deal with the mean kids that say horrible things, I have to be the one that makes sure cards are signed and play dates are made and kept to. I have to be the one that makes sure there’s dinner on the table. I have to be totally selfless.
On days where I want to crawl into a ball and cry or eat my weight (which is a lot) of chocolate and not speak to anyone I have to get up and be the Mum. I give my time and every tiny last drop of energy to the house. I give everything until there’s nothing left and yet I still end up giving more, I can’t tell you how because I don’t even know myself.
I’m the one that has to deal with tantrums and being called mean for being strict or with holding things for bad behaviour. I get told no when I want/ need a cuddle or to watch something I like or take a picture together.
I’m a mum. A mother of a demanding 4 year old who knows what she wants and at times doesn’t care if she’s being selfish because why would she? The past 4 years I’ve given and given and never really asked for much in return. When is it acceptable to start expecting back? Is it? Am I doomed to a whole life of never really getting the things in life I want… just because I’m the Mum?
I know my daughter isn’t a selfish person because I see her kindness daily, I see it with her friends, her cousins and I see it with her dad and her new baby sister. The love and affection she shares is incredible to see. I just wish sometimes that it was directed at me.
I struggle with these moments in the days, the constant arguing with a hot headed 4 year old who’s just like me. The melt downs, especially those in public! But then they look at you with love and say things like ‘you’re the best mum in the world’ and honestly… is it really that bad being the mum?
Ask me again tomorrow.
Until the next post,
Are and Pops.